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Take me out tonight Because I want to see people and I Want to see life Driving in your car

May. 8th, 2007 | 12:53 am
mood: curiouscurious
music: The smiths

I realized why it hurts to watch almost famous.
i think it is because i miss that feeling it used to give me.  
The feeling of my life and how it felt to have no responsibilities 
I miss my friends that i have back in bloomington.  its sad because i got so close to a handful of them and then they ripped me out of my small dorm room and threw me out on to the streets...or i guess my parents car.  I was placed in that room in the begining of the school year full of ambitions and then it broke me and made me in to a better virsion of myself.  but now its hard transistion to come back home again.  I guess its a reality check or something but for me it means change and we all know...or i guess i know how i handle change and its not well.
 want my schedual back damnit and i don't care to see anyone else.  I want my life back.  I LIKE to eat the same thing, I LIKE my same paths i take every day, and i LIKE that i see the same people.  
I just have to make due for a couple of months.  
I wonder where they will take me.

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Wonderful.

Aug. 18th, 2006 | 02:09 am

I'm trying to recognize myself.

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Spinning

Jul. 30th, 2006 | 01:35 am
music: Midnight Radio

people keep surprising me with each passing day.
they give me a realization of my self and keep me on my toes.
my mind keeps thinking on how people effect me and how I effect them.

I tend to trust what the people who constantly surround me or used to constantly surround me tell me.
though they drift farther and farther away from me with every passing hour to the day 
I try to hold on to their words and take them for truth. I believe its because it honestly feels good.
IT feels pretty damn good for you to believe friendships are still alive.
BUT then, but then, reality steps in...it clears the crust from your eyes and BAM it hits you. you realize you become replaced with new people and 
new experiences...or drugs.

I'm guilty of it to...it just comes with growing up.

I’ve got to put the past away.

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lets do some living after we die...

May. 26th, 2006 | 11:53 am
mood: indescribableindescribable
music: the rolling stones

Angie, Angie, when will those clouds all disappear?
Angie, Angie, where will it lead us from here?
With no loving in our souls and no money in our coats
You can't say we're satisfied
But Angie, Angie, you can't say we never tried
Angie, you're beautiful, but ain't it time we said good-bye?
Angie, I still love you, remember all those nights we cried?
All the dreams we held so close seemed to all go up in smoke
Let me whisper in your ear:
Angie, Angie, where will it lead us from here?
Oh, Angie, don't you weep, all your kisses still taste sweet
I hate that sadness in your eyes
But Angie, Angie, ain't it time we said good-bye?
With no loving in our souls and no money in our coats
You can't say we're satisfied
But Angie, I still love you, baby
Ev'rywhere I look I see your eyes
There ain't a woman that comes close to you
Come on Baby, dry your eyes
But Angie, Angie, ain't it good to be alive?
Angie, Angie, they can't say we never tried 






jason mraz

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swing swiftly towards happier times...

May. 15th, 2006 | 06:45 pm
mood: contemplativecontemplative
music: jason mraz

Its weird how you can bond with someone just by sitting next to them and not saying a word.
Something different for me anyways, i'm learning a lot.



<3




the roads unencumbered by cats they're burning like wet matches thru my miracle mile mind you left your thumbprint inside me now for months it seems but mine only brushes your soft surface and somehow it leaves me listless, my tongue curls under my lips oh yes so I cant speak to tell you of the months before I met you 

and the way the truth it locked us right about the time after the lightning shocked us when we were young and missing round that small new england byway our lives they were sheltered then and I now I remember

-jason mraz

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Prom.

May. 15th, 2006 | 06:39 pm
mood: mellowmellow
music: Jason Mraz





LOVED the prom part.

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the rain still smells sweet...

Apr. 16th, 2006 | 08:23 pm
mood: confusedconfused
music: Ray LaMontagne

I feel like I am entwined in a sick twist of reality. (side note: i've always liked this phrase.) 
but...
God damn it
why do I have to feel like this, I tell myself not to but...why can't I control my emotions.
I go with whatever feels right.  My emotions can ruin me. 
Why do i want so bad to give in? 
I hate to admit it but I feel it and i have always felt it.  I think I just want to find out if it is real.
it's weird how a person can effect me so much.
My emotions will eventually ruin me.  Its inevitable.
I tend to go with my heart instead of my head.


Jolene

Cocaine flame in my bloodstream
Sold my coat when I hit Spokane
Bought myself a hard pack of cigarettes in the early morning rain
Lately my hands they don't feel like mine
My eyes been stung with dust, I'm blind
Held you in my arms one time
Lost you just the same
Jolene
I ain't about to go straight
It's too late
I found myself face down in the ditch
Booze on my hair
Blood on my lips
A picture of you, holding a picture of me
in the pocket of my blue jeans
Still don't know what love means
Still don't know what love means
Jolene
Ah, La, La, La, La, La
Jolene
Been so long since I seen your face
or felt a part of this human race
I've been living out of this here suitcase for way too long
A man needs something he can hold onto
A nine pound hammer or a woman like you
Either one of them things will do
Jolene
I ain't about to go straight
It's too late
I found myself face down in the ditch
Booze in my hair
Blood on my lips
A picture of you, holding a picture of me
In the pocket of my blue jeans
Still don't know what love means
Still don't know what love means
Jolene
La, La, La, La, La, La, La
Jolene
La, La, La, La, La, La, La
Jolene 



just in general...
somehow a person cannot feel complete without the other.

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Trouble

Apr. 8th, 2006 | 10:21 am
mood: draineddrained
music: Pink Floyd

Things are not as good as they used to be.
I can't stand people who are immature and cannot realize who they are and try to find it in the fear of what other people think of them. so they put up their guard and do not see themselves as they do but base it on the thoughts of other peers.
let me just say to all the "non conformist" be yourself, find yourself.
don't judge. give your peers a chance.
accept people for once. you seem to be missing something...trust?
that may be it. self confidence? that’s probably it.
Get over yourself or things will become out of your reach.
I want to find something real instead of this on going failing attempt to impress.

we're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl year after year.

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...

Apr. 8th, 2006 | 10:03 am
music: pink floyd

i hate men...well then again boys.

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For a pocketful of mumbles such are promises.

Feb. 26th, 2006 | 08:30 pm
mood: tiredtired
music: simon and garfunkel

I’ve been thinking allot lately about people and why they act the way they do.
they are a funny thing you know...people.  I mean what are they to me anyway?
why am I friends with the people I am friends with? oh yes it is because they make me feel alive.
so why do I love?  I think it is about the same reason because somehow you are feeling something that you can't experience in every day life.
but why can't we experience it all the time it seems like we should be able to.  why can't we be with the people we love all the time? why do we have
to feel detached?  When I am with a person I adore it is amazing and sad at the same time because it cannot last forever.  
I have always wanted to just stay in bed with whoever I am loving all day and all night.  I am not talking about sex I am talking about comfort.
when I am under the covers I feel total completeness.  I guess that’s why humans love because they are always searching for the feeling of being complete and comforted.  We should have this forever because this is what has us feeling alive.  We should all be aloud to feel this at least this and nothing else.
"love draws our original nature back together." -Plato

 

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